Archive | July, 2013

dichotomy in me

21 Jul

….and it comes out of nowhere.

that hollow, heavy, cloudy, lack of everything feeling.  

it consumes me.  it shuts me down.

the bleakness encompasses my entire being.  makes me doubt.  makes me forget who i am.

i know, however, that this feeling wont last forever.  it never does.  though it threatens to.

but then, when i’ve almost surrendered, something magical happens.  

a spark

a beam

and then….

the light comes pouring back in.  and my heart and soul fill with it.

and i am grateful

and i am joyful

and i believe

and i remember

i’m so thankful for the relief.  the light.  

so thankful that i thank the dark.  

thank you empty, heavy, cloudy, lack of everything feeling

for without you, 

i wouldnt know the joy

of being blinded by love


A little Jen-spective

5 Jul

Time goes by, you learn, you grow. You realize…

One thing I realize lately is that silence is most often the best weapon in your arsenal when you find yourself in a disagreement about anything, important or otherwise.
  First of all….the people who would benefit most by the opening of their conditioned, under-exercised little minds to another point of view simply “can not handle the truth.”  Their lives just would not make the same comfortable kind of sense if they begin to comprehend a different perspective.  
 Secondly….. It turns out your example has so much more power than the words you use to explain yourself.  Words are powerful in their own right, but are often misconstrued and tend to take on different meanings altogether when passed through different filters.  Plus people become confused, frustrated and sometimes belligerent when you start talking over their heads.
 And third….the more life I live and the more I allow new perspectives to shape my experience, the less I care about your ability to understand me. If I have to work that hard, I’d rather just go hang out with someone  else…. Call me lazy!  Arguing is a waste of time and energy.
You can have your point.  And I’ll keep mine.