25 Sep

Birthdays are a fitting time, it seems, to reflect on a life.  Check in, see how you’re doing.  To ask yourself “is this the life i was created to have?”  Or “is there something else i can do?”

Looking back on 44 years (woah!  Where has the time gone?) I see a life filled with its share of ups and downs.  Blessings like an amazing family and friends, “curses” like the depression that has lingered in the backdrop of my life, occasionally rising to the forefront and seemingly deterring my plans for carefree happiness.  I am extra grateful for the people who have loved me during the times when i could not love myself.   They were the buoys that kept me from drowning in the depths of a sadness that never really had a rhyme or reason.

Never did i imagine that I’d ever actually be able to be grateful for the depression itself, but recently I’ve been enlightened to the fact that my melancholy has been the catalyst for a journey to peace and joy that surely I’d have not travelled willingly without.

The endless searching…Therapy, books (and more books), medication; and more recently more books 🙂 and MEDITATION have brought me to a higher plane.  A place where i can look down and appreciate the darkness.  For without it, i’d not know the brilliance of the light that surrounds every moment of my life at present.

So as i turn 44 in just under an hour, I thank you family, thank you friends, thank you darkness.  I am grateful for you and this life, far from over and full of promise!

Happy birthday to me.


One Response to “birthdays”

  1. Jeremy January 20, 2014 at 7:43 am #

    I love it!!

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